Kris Kristofferson's Promise 

By TAD BARTIMUS

Once in a while, a guest with something important to say visits AMONG FRIENDS. On this Valentine's Day, actor/singer/songwriter Kris Kristofferson - a man who has explored the meanings of loss and love in his many roles in life -- gives us a special love story to ponder:

While recovering from triple bypass surgery a couple of years ago, I was explaining to our youngest child - who was 4 years old at the time - about the things you could do with diet and exercise to take care of your heart. After a few beats, he said, "The best thing you can do for your heart is to love somebody."

I live with my wife of 18 years and our five of my eight children. We have a warm, loving relationship with my older kids and my granddaughter. I love the way the children delight in each other. They are as different as snowflakes, but they are all bright, funny, happy people who truly enjoy each other's company.

In truth, what I know about love, and loving somebody, I owe to my children. I've always believed in the importance of heart in whatever you're doing, and life's had plenty of hunger, passion, pleasure, etc. But the unconditional love I experienced with each of my children was something new. Pure, absolutely unselfish, absolutely without strings. 
Of course, with your children it's as easy as breathing, but it was a while before I even thought of looking at their mamas like that. Fortunately, I've lived long enough to get better at it. I guess the task is to work it outwards 'til you look at the whole human race that way.

I love where we live. I love the morning revelation of the perfect, empty horizon, the rain showers and storm clouds moving across the water, and the awesome burning entrance of the Sun of God (my son's expression) -- crimson, gold, always breathtaking, magically awakening the bird sounds on this lush, green slope of a mountain we call home. Somebody said they call this piece of the mountain The Land of Deep, Eternal Love. Works for me.
I would like my children to remember that it feels better to love than to be loved.

And put your heart in it, just like you do with the things you really love, like your sports or your music.
Love is the noblest emotion, worthy of your constant attention.

I'm offering as a Valentine lines from a song I wrote for my children. And their mamas. It's called "The Promise."

"You gave me back my soul again by showing me
the laughter and the wonder in your eyes
and saved me from the shuttered man I used to be
and opened up the windows of my life.
And the happiness you've given me for loving you
is sweeter love and deeper every day.
But I can't stop the changes that you're growing through
or someone new from stealing you away.
So, darling, when it's time, you can spread your wings
and I'll set you free
to fly away, and it's okay
cause, darling, Time changes everything
but it won't change me
I love you, oh, I love you.
Inside of me you'll always be my valentine
and I pray your freedom makes your dreams come true.
As long as there's a heartbeat in this soul of mine,
you'll know there's someone so in love with you.


© 2001 The Women Syndicate

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