Intermission

By TAD BARTIMUS

It doesn't matter that the rug's got cranberry sauce on it and the sink's full of dirty pie plates. Forget about the 15 messages on your answering machine, especially the one from your mother-in-law telling you she doesn't like the present you shopped three malls to find. So what if your mate is super-glued to the recliner waiting for the sixth bowl game? Let the kids raise a ruckus with their new electronic toys; be glad they're occupied elsewhere.

This is a rare chance to claim an hour for yourself. Maybe even two. Shove the pile of wrinkled laundry to the far corner of the couch, put your feet up and take a deep breath. It's intermission, the blessed respite between Christmas' first act and New Year's finale. If you can't give yourself a gift of time this week there's no hope for you. So seize this moment to look back on your busy year. Set aside the "I shoulds" and reflect on the "I dids:"

You worked 10-hour days and many a weekend for your family;
You tried to eat healthy and stay fit;
You paid taxes and voted;
You gave as much to charity as you could afford;
You remembered birthdays, anniversaries, bar mitzvahs, bat mitzvahs, the sick, the grieving and the newborn;
You baked cookies for the preschool fair, donated chicken wire for the high school homecoming float, gritted your teeth and smiled at your spouse's office party and only wrote one hostile letter to the editor;
You almost balanced your checkbook, successfully programmed the VCR twice and finally figured out how to set the clock on the microwave;
You nursed everybody through colds, a couple of broken bones and hay fever while staying on your feet with the flu;
You stopped telling ethnic jokes, refused to repeat racial slurs and banned the word "Monica" in your presence;
You stood up to the auto mechanic, remembered to tip the hotel maid as well as the bellhop and finally bought a suitcase with wheels;
You didn't send in a Publisher's Clearinghouse entry;
You got a mammogram, made your husband get a prostate exam, paid off the orthodontist and got the pets vaccinated;
You called your mother once a week and went fishing with your dad;
You let your sister cook the turkey, kept your mouth shut when your brother bragged about his latest IPO investment and volunteered to wash the dishes.
You are a good person doing the best you can.

So…remember that new book under the tree? Pick it up and start reading. Those music CDs in your stocking? Borrow your daughter's portable player, close your eyes and listen for a while. Unwrap those bath salts and scented soaps and claim the tub for a quiet soak.

Humans are the only creatures who are too hard on themselves. Dogs loll. Birds roost. When cats get tired they sleep; when they're hungry, they eat. Mostly they lay in the sun and yawn. There's a lesson there.

Next week we enter the year 2000. Life will just keep getting faster and faster as our lives become shorter and shorter. In this brief intermission, as the world waits for the next act, take time to stand still, lie down, nap.

You've earned it.

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