Hearts and Heartache

By TAD BARTIMUS

Hallmark can't help Bill Clinton on February 14th.

Valentines say things like "you are my one and only," or "for the love of my life" or "now and forever." None of them say, "I can never make up for what I've done to you."

The President has professed many times to many people that he feels their pain, but there's no way Bill Clinton can feel Hillary Clinton's anguish. As we watch her soldier on through the most publicized humiliation any wife has ever endured there surely isn't a woman on the planet who can't relate to the situation the First Lady faces. If there is, I don't want to meet her.

Before the President admitted to lying about his relationship with Monica, Mrs. Clinton defended her husband against what she was led to believe were false allegations. She told NBC's Today Show audience nobody knows what goes on in a marriage except the two people in it, and that's still true. But the more public a spouse's infidelity becomes, the more embarrassing it gets for the betrayed. By now even mahouts in Nepal can spell Lewinski.

Usually, when the truth comes out, pressure builds between a warring couple until rage boils over, scalding everybody and often forcing one or the other to leave.

Usually, when the truth comes out, pressure builds between a warring couple until rage boils over, scalding everybody and often forcing one or the other to leave. If Hillary was Jane Doe she might have thrown her mate's boxer shorts and pork rinds into the street by now, shouting "Good riddance! And don't let the front door hit your backside on the way out."

But who kicks who out of the White House? The Clintons -- like the country -- are hostages to the Starr investigation and the Senate impeachment proceedings. They reside on a gilded island in the middle of a sea of voyeurs, with trial transcripts to read and only each other to talk to without fear of being subpoenaed to testify about their conversation. Except for legal and political strategizing, what can they have to say to one another? They appear friendly and affectionate at photo opportunities, but surely, behind closed doors, their real lives are on hold until lawmakers again turn their attention to bread instead of circuses (please God, let that happen sooner rather than later.)

A quarter of a century for any couple means special songs sung together and danced to, inside jokes, endearments saved for the middle of the night. Photo albums accumulate happy snaps of a baby cradled in loving arms, adoring gazes on anniversaries, good times stacked like dry cordwood for hard winters. No union begins without promises made, dreams dreamed. As the years pass, these commitments hold a marriage together and lend meaning to paper cards decorated with cupids.

Now the Clintons' dreams have come a cropper. They reached the pinnacle of power they both wanted and it has yielded disgrace, disappointment and debt. Their daughter mediates between them, their loyal friends face financial ruin defending themselves, some professional colleagues already have been jailed while others are scared of going there.

Long ago, during her first public test of loyalty to a husband who didn't deserve it, Hillary Clinton was disdainful of Tammy Wynette's "Stand By Your Man," implying she wasn't really that kind of woman. Turns out, she is. Only time will tell if she is the kind of woman in Wynette's other big hit, "D-I-V-O-R-C-E."

No matter how high she lifts her chin, no matter how wide she forces her smile, this must be Hillary Clinton's saddest Valentine's Day. A dozen roses and box of chocolates won't fix what's really broken and that's her heart.

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